She sat in the darkened room gazing out the window. The clock read 8:00pm and he still wasn’t home. No call or anything and once again dinner had come and gone. It had been like this every Tuesday and Thursday night for the past six months. Fear and sadness gripped her heart, she began to weep.
Violent tears streamed down her cheeks as she turned to face the picture. It was a young man and woman with their arms around each other. You could feel the love they so passionately shared just by gazing into the eyes of each of them. It was so hard to believe that it was just taken five years prior, on their wedding day. She sighed and closed her eyes as her mind traveled back in time.
Sometimes it felt like yesterday, but others it felt like centuries had passed. She missed the old days. Back then she felt loved and there weren’t too many times that she questioned her purpose for being alive. She knew it was to love him and spend the rest of her life being his companion, so they got married.
Recently their lives had changed. He started coming home late from work two nights a week. He told her that he had to work overtime. She wanted to believe him, but there was always a nagging feeling in her heart, that he wasn’t being honest. It’s been six months. I am so tired of this crap, she said to herself. No phone calls, no explanations. He must have found someone else.
A few hours later she got up and crawled into the cold bed. The tears stained her pillow. She knew she had to confront him. She couldn’t keep living like everything was fine when it wasn’t. She had to put an end to it some how.
A few minutes later he walked into the bedroom whistling. She bit her tongue and pretended to sleep as he slipped into the bed. With every
deep breath that he took, her anger grew stronger. She wanted to face him and let him have it right then and there, but she knew that it would wake the children. So she laid there simmering in the darkness.
The next morning as she fixed breakfast she tried to figure out how to bring it up. Her hands were shaking because she was so afraid. She loved him so much and couldn’t bear the thought of losing him. She didn’t want to take that chance, but she had no other choice.
After the twins left for preschool she sighed as sat down at the table. He glanced up from the paper he was reading. He knew something was wrong.
After a few minutes she just blurted it out. “I can’t take this anymore. The lies have become too much. It has gone on far too long. “Are you seeing someone else?”
With trembling hands he reached for his glass of milk and knocked onto the floor. It shattered into a million pieces. He glanced down at the mess and then back up at her. She got up and walked over to the sink and stared out the window, not really looking at anything in particular. The tears started to form in her eyes as she grabbed a towel and began to clean up the mess. They became stronger with every swipe of the towel.
“Honey, please listen to me”, he pleaded. With that she got up and left the room. Her paced quickened with every step. She knew exactly what she had to do.
She walked into the bedroom and pulled the two large suit cases from the closet and laid them across the bed. She could hardly see through
the tears. She didn’t even look up when he came into the room. She couldn’t stand to look at him. It made her ill.
“I’ve never thought of having an affair. I couldn’t do a thing like that to you.” She tried to ignore him, but she couldn’t.
“So, you are going to try to talk your way out of this huh? I should’ve known…
”That isn’t it at all. I am trying to tell you the truth for crying out loud!”
“Just forget it, it’s over, I’m done with the lies. Leave me alone!”
He grabbed his briefcase out of the closet and began to rummage through it and pulled out something that appeared to be a logbook. He
handed it to her; she took it and opened it. The date on the first page was right around the time that all of the heartache began. As she flipped from page to page she realized it was a journal. She closed it and looked up at him puzzled. “What the heck is this for”?
He pulled the car keys from his pocket, took her hand and led her out of the house. “I don’t have to come with you. Let go of me”
“Just get in the car and I promise that you won’t regret it.” In silence she slipped into the passenger seat and stared at her feet the entire ride.
Twenty minutes later they pulled up to a large brick building with a sign that read: “Dallas Home For The Mentally Impaired”. “Oh nice, you bring me to a mental hospital. That explains everything.” She rolled her eyes as she followed him into the entrance.
As they walked down the long, quiet hallway she bit her nails in nervous frustration. They walked up to the receptionist’s desk. “Hello, Mr. Harris, How are you today?”
“I am just fine, Betty”, he said with a smile. Tears welled up in her eyes as she watched in confusion.
Shrieks of excitement filled the once quiet room, “Bwother! Bwother!” The man running towards them appeared to be in his late twenty’s to early
thirty’s. She fought back the tears as the man embraced her husband.
“I would like you to meet my older brother. This is where I have been after work a few times a week for the past several months. “You never told me that you had a brother.” “Nice to finally meet you”, she said through a forced smile.
The nurse took the man’s hand. “Come with me Bobby; let’s let them have some privacy for a few minutes”. “But I dun wanna go. I wanna see muh bwother.”, He cried as they walked away.
They walked over to the waiting room and sat in an empty corner. “I am sorry. I know I should have told you sooner, but I was afraid that you wouldn’t understand.” He took her hands and looked her in the eyes. “Six months ago I received a phone call from a social worker who had my brother in custody. They told me how my parents gave him up for adoption to a family who dealt with special needs children. They passed away six months ago and since my parents have died as well, they contacted me. My parents must have figured that I would never need to know about my brother, but I guess they were wrong. So, for the past several months I have been coming here twice a week and helping and getting to know Bobby. I never meant to hurt you and make you think things that were untrue. I am sorry.”
A few minutes later Bobby came skipping into the waiting room. With a boyish grin on his face he exclaimed, “Bwother, I luv ew.” Her eyes filled will tears as her husband stood and hugged him. A smile crept across her face and forgiveness filled her heart as she saw the love in the eyes of a stranger.
03/12/05